Tuesday, August 23, 2011
A litte frustrated
As I have gone through my life I have had moments where I pray to God and tell him that I just can't take anymore. Many of these moments have been in the last few months and I am sure more are in my future. I look at what I have gone through and then I think about Stockton. The little guy has such huge obstacles to cross and was born with an imperfect body. Lately, has been quite the struggle for him. Stockton is up to eating 40cc which is exceptional. (Sometimes more but sometimes less.) Last week they started giving Stockton some extra calories in his bottles. He seemed to be tolerating them well. Last Friday after he pulled out his NG tube they replaced it on the other side. Stockton has really not been the same since then. I am not sure if the NG tube is bothering him but something is. They changed the brand of calories he is getting so hopefully he wouldn't be so fussy after eating. Well, that didn't work. We were giving him gas meds and the poor little guy would just scream after each bottle even though he was so hungry. Sometimes he would get so upset he would just throw up his entire feeding. Stockton is now on an acid reflux medicine and we will see if that helps. I just get irritated that there are so many factors for why he would be fussy. Yes, he could have acid reflux, but what about the new brand of calories? What about the NG tube, that could be bothering him. What about the doctors thinking that he needs all these calories. Have they looked at my husband and I? We are little people. Tylee has never been in the upper percentile for weight. We are lucky if she is in the 30%. There are so many things going on and I am to the point where I think the hospital is doing more damage than good. I just want to go home and feed Stockton with plain breastmilk. He was doing great on it before. With these heart babies they are so worried about weight that I just get bothered. I just want Stockton to be ok and not be bothered all the time. The poor little guy has gone through enough in his first 3 weeks of life.
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I am so sorry to hear this, it is so frustrating to see your child in pain. It sounds like he is intolerant to the formula or the stuff they are putting in. This sound just like what Gabi went through, I dealt with it till she was almost 2, the crying after eating and throwing it all back up. Gabi would cry and cry and the reflux meds helped a little but didn't make much of a difference. I had to go on a special diet and breast feed because the formula only made the symptoms worse. I can't imagine being in your situation where as a mother you are seeing what is best for your baby and the doctors won't let you do what you need for your baby. I am so sorry. LOVE YOU!
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